Her Father’s Homestead

Surely some of you know the rest of that aphorism.  Because of my belief in the power of words, often stated here - words matter - I won’t be finishing the statement;  in fact today we’ll  do a test run on a new ending, give it a new spin. And I do love spin

So if I say No Good Deed Goes Unrewarded, what do you think?    The question becomes unrewarded by whom. It doesn’t matter. Since I operate under the belief system that says you don’t work your way to your final resting place, the reward for a good deed is internal.  You saw something, you addressed it, and you know in your heart that you did a good thing.

The person or persons for whom you did this good thing may or may not even realize it.  Doesn’t matter. Let me clarify, it doesn’t matter on an outward level.  Here we go again, semantics.  You bet, I love it So where does it matter? Inside, inside you and that’s what counts in this discussion.

Every time you take the opportunity to  do a “good deed” however small, it matters in you.  Note I say IN you, not to you.  We grow every time we take an opportunity to make a difference, something as small as smiling at the elderly man for whom you hold the door, every time you offer an encouraging word or turn aside an angry retort.  It matters IN you and that’s why I’m pretty comfortable saying that No Good Deed Goes Unrewarded.

The reward is the growth that comes inside because you stepped out and did it.  That’s what matters.  Keep doing it and you will keep doing it.  It’s a mindset, a way of looking at the world, a philosophy, if you will. Go on out and have a fabulous day and when you have the chance (not IF, WHEN) take it.  Look for these opportunities - they’re everywhere.  Here’s to growing as we go …..

À plus tard

A two-TA DA! evening - quite a way to end the weekend!!  Not time-for-sleep end as I still have a transcript due in the morning, but the challenging  part of the weekend is successfully completed.  Top that off with a fun conversation with a special  niece and a “night-night” phone call with my ErinLee and if I didn’t still have to work and it wasn’t past midnight, I’d crank up some music and dance around the kitchen :)  because two TA DA!s is pretty all right!

Isn’t that just the way things go sometimes?  I’ve been studying lots, loving my current classes and as my favorite Auntie Arlene said, these classes are right up my alley.  I’m dealing with words - this week all the ologies and isms that come with a class titled Theology for Today.  Add to that my General Survey of the New Testament class and I’m in my element!!  Reading, studying, learning and best of all writing - working hard in addition to life in general, and then to be well rewarded for these efforts with great feedback from fellow students, a maximum grade on a tough paper, and finally 100%, the second week running, on the theology test due each Sunday night.

I’m feeling very blessed and believing  that, as challenging as it’s been to add  this education track to an already complex life after so many years, these successes may indeed be confirmation that I’m on the right path.  And that is an even bigger TA DA!        … Bonne  soirée

I spent two hours yesterday with an amazing young woman whom I’ve come to know and love.  She’s smart, funny, musical, bilingual, beautiful and though she’s young enough to be my daughter, I call her Friend.   As I’ve told her parents over the years, she is as beautiful on the inside as she is on the outside.  And in a few days her life takes a new turn as she heads to Europe. I’ll miss her, became teary-eyed during our goodbye hugs; I am so very proud to know her and so privileged to be part of her life.

We shared a sandwich, talked and talked and talked some more - about the world in which we live, goals and dreams, family, mutual friends, politics, you name it; we covered a lot of ground as we always do.   Thankfully we have the Internet and she’ll be blogging, so I can track her experiences. And I am certain that she will absolutely thrive and return to us an even more beautiful person than she is today.

We share important characteristics - our faith and the fact that we are both pastor’s daughters - for starters.  While we have a fair amount in common,  as women of different generations - very different life experiences.  It is so inspiring and encouraging to observe her moving confidently into a world substantially different than what was available to me 30+ years ago.  And she’s made wise choices.

As I think of her now and reflect on our time together, I’m hopeful.  The future is bright with young women such as my friend - women who’ll be the mothers and wives and leaders of tomorrow.  So as she goes off to foreign lands to live and learn and grow, I pray she soars like the Biblical eagle lifted high on the wings of the Lord.

Travel well- Godspeed.  And I say with love, Bon voyage, my friend!

An uneventful flight; actually, travel was very good.  This Delta/Northwest merger has resulted in a very classy airline.  The service was excellent, personnel very professional, very helpful. Compared to some of the service we’ve experienced in the last year, this rates very well!

A year ago on Dec. 23, I was sitting at O’Hare, full of folks who’d been stranded for up to two days by Midwest weather on a busy holiday.  This year I changed two things:   I’m traveling earlier, December 20th instead of the 23rd and I avoided Chicago.  The plane change in Detroit was a walk in the park and we arrived in Columbia EARLY!  That’s a nice change of pace for air travel.

I’m comfy at the Barnes & Noble where Meghan works part-time, a stack of cookbooks on Southern cooking at my side.  This is about as good as it gets, my child within reach, bright blue skies, people wearing light jackets as opposed to the four layers I had on when arriving.  The only thing better would be having my ErinLee here as well, but I’m thankful for what I’ve got.

We’ve been to Meghan’s house, so I’ve finally seen her new home.  I teased her that not only is she a homeowner, she has landscaping, something called monkey grass, ivy and a flowering plant I’ll have to investigate.  We’ve already identified a couple projects to do together and I offered to put her new rake to good use when she’s at work.  I’ll need the exercise as we’ve already eaten well and are planning our next meal

It doesn’t look like Christmas outside, but there’s Christmas music in the air and decorations all around.  While it’s weird not to have snow, this is pretty awesome.

So it’s almost Christmas.  I hope you’re all where you want to be, with those you love and who love you.  I’ll be back in a bit.

My last post of 2009 from my home.  In 12 hours I’ll be arriving in Green Bay to catch a bit of sleep before flying out  at 6:30 a.m.  And in 28 hours I will be hugging my beloved Meghan and seeing her new home for the first time.  Am I excited?  You have no idea!!!  As my cousin Jane reminded me, this will give me the energy I need to get everything done.

So what’s the TA DA for?  I have completed another term in school.  I have done battle with algebra and am still standing.  More logical than ever?  I’m too tired to say right now, but I’ve done it, it’s history.  Will I dance around my kitchen as mentioned in a post back in August?  Very likely as I’ve got to keep moving through this day, checking off the list.    Sounds like time for a song, one that contains two of my all-time favorite song lines - check it out and sing with me.

Quickly, what are the two lines?   “Just remember this my girl, if you look up in the sky you can  see the stars and still not see the light.”  Amen to that.  The other is, “So often times it happens that we live our lives in chains and we never even know we have the key.”   It’s time for me to get on my feet.

Blessings to you all in these last pre-Christmas days.  And while I’m anxiously awaiting the gift of time with my Meghan, I’m mindful of the reason behind this celebration - the best Gift ever.  Hope you have it in your life.

Merry Christmas, 2009.  Cherish your friends and family; reach out to those in need.  Coming to you next from the warmth of  South Carolina …

Memories…  My girls and I have been talking about memories, fun things, funny sayings.  The title of this post is an example of a line that makes us smile.  I’m known for always being cold, well before any surgeries or health challenges - I’m just cold-blooded.  The girls would say with eyes rolling, “Mom’s cold, we have to put on a sweater.”  That’s a favorite.

The other day I saw a saying about dancing in the rain.  Reminded me of my girls.  In a text to  ErinLee, I shared the line and reminisced about how she loved to play in the rain.  She reminded me of the time she went  into the backyard to play in the rain in her underwear and accidentally locked herself out.  Big smile at that memory

There are so many.  Last year at this time I was posting a Countdown, counting down the days until I was in warmer climes with my Meghan for Christmas.   This year I haven’t been counting down until today, when Meghan reminded me that it’s only five days till we’re together.  Five crazy busy days during which I’ll clean my house - another whole set of memories from my own childhood, carried  into my children’s  lives and  into the present day.  Thanks, Mom -  a story in itself.  I will take two final exams, and as promised back in August, finish the dreaded algebra.  Not to mention laundry, packing, paperwork, banking,  a Merry Christmas hug for my favorite Auntie Arlene before I go, so many things to finish.

It won’t be long now.  Temperature here in the North Woods is heading toward a wind chill of 20 below tonight. So as I get back to the business of finishing a semester and  preparing to be away for a couple weeks, I’m telling you, I’m so cold, y’all get those sweaters on, you hear?

It got ugly out there.  I have a friend who’d call it “wicked cold.”  She’s from the East and apparently that’s a colloquialism and her adjective of choice.    I call it BRUTAL and realize all-caps equals shouting in cyber-English, but that’s my way of letting you know that it did indeed get ugly.  As so often happens, along with the ugly, we get a flash of awesome!!  Reference my posts last year about Sparkles, here in Wisconsin and on the beach in South Carolina.

What I got the other day was much more than a sparkle - it was a most spectacular opportunity!   I saw the wind. Yep, I said that I saw the wind, first time ever, and I’ve seen lots of weather in lots of places.  This was a most beautiful upside of a most ugly weather day.

It was so cool, so awesome, breath-taking actually.  I wish I’d been able to photograph it, but my memory  will have to serve.  I was watching the weather out a window, facing north, snow  blowing like crazy.  All of a sudden what appeared to be a huge wave of snow, came around the corner of the big shed.  As I described it to my daughters, it was bigger than anything we’ve seen live in the ocean,  like those huge waves you see on television in the surfing competitions.

I swear, this wave of snow came around that building and moved  across my yard, into the field.  It was incredible, taller than the shed and wide, so very wide.  I watched this wave moving along and I was stunned by the force that could do that and hope I’m even close to portraying the sight.

Those who know me well will understand, knowing my fascination with “big” weather :)    This spoke volumes to me.  Two days later as I write this, I’m still thrilled to have been watching at the right time.

Were there other gusts of wind?  I’m sure there were seeing as that’s one of the criteria for blizzard. But I choose to believe that this was a gift to me, a reminder of this amazing creation  in which we live and even more, of the gift to me of this place, this homestead that means so very much to me.

The lesson here - you know there’s got to be one - is thankfulness.  In the darkest of times, there is always something for which I’m thankful.  This has been a week of blessings despite the weather and I’m going to close here, a very thankful woman.

There’s a warning here, with good reason.  Started last night, made for interesting travel home from a Christmas party in a nearby town.  There’s a warning here, blizzard no less, serious weather, dangerous conditions, zero visibility.

There are warnings everywhere, aren’t there?  They don’t all come with flashing lights or that annoying signal used on radio and TV or ribbons scrolling across your television screen or  a yellow light.  But they’re warnings just the same.

How do you react to warnings?  Fear?  Doubt? Skepticism? Do you logically come up with a Plan A and a Plan B as well?

I’m heeding the weather warning for now and am bundling into serious winter gear to head outside.  Thanks to a neighbor, the bulk of the plowing is complete, but wind is wicked and walls of snow are blowing around, changing the landscape.  Anyway, while I’m outside doing clean-up with the snow-thrower, I’ll be finishing this post in my head.  So think about the many warnings we receive in our daily life and how we handle them.  I’m off to the great outdoors.

Some of you know I’m a musician.  That affects how I remember things and how I learn.  No to mention that I’m a child of the 60s and 70s so it should be no surprise to find music throughout these pages.  Today we borrow from Bowie - David the musician, as opposed to Jim, of knife fame.
I’ve been thinking about change a lot these days.  Its been a  subject of discussion in my humanities class, which I’m loving, by the way I had to respond to a statement by my professor as to how people view and  respond to change.

Coupled with the letters I sent my girls for St. Nick’s and the memories that brought up, change has indeed, been on my mind.  As I wrote for my class: change is life and life is change.  Sounds so simple, doesn’t it? Pain-free, stress-free, just like change itself.

Not so?  I look at how my life has changed and how I’ve dealt with it; how my girls have changed - independent young women now, living far away from me and each other, yet remaining close thanks to technology.  Ch-ch-ch-changes.

And while I speak easily about my girls being so far away, much of the time  I do not like it one bit!!!  St. Nick comes tomorrow and I didn’t unpack the Christmas stockings, two years running now.  Those stockings I made - love and anticipation sewn into every stitch.  I didn’t grow up with St. Nick, but my girls discovered him the year ErinLee came home from preschool in tears because St. Nick didn’t like her.  He only skips the children who’ve been bad, she said.   So St. Nick became part of our lives.

Talked to ErinLee moments ago - we laughed about how  very often I got it wrong.  St. Nick came a day early or a day late; for whatever reason I struggled with that one.  When they were of an age to understand, we shared many laughs over St. Nick.  But it was always special because that’s when the stockings came out.  We’ll talk about those another time.

In the meantime, in this  pre-Christmas season, give some thought to the many changes and the many benefits you’ve reaped because of them.  Change isn’t always comfortable, but it often precedes dramatic growth. Ch-ch-ch-changes.                                                    Later…

Someone close to me lost someone close to her over the weekend.  Totally unexpected while on a trip ten years in the making.  In an instant a father, husband and best friend of 28 years, is gone and a wife is alone in the woods with her husband’s body, trying desperately to save him with CPR.  Two mornings later, 5:00 a.m., my daughter calls to say she’s at the airport, checked in and ready to fly to NYC for a fabulous six days with a special aunt!  And what does someone say to me?  Didn’t you hear about the terrorist threat in New York?  Sure I did.  I don’t go there, don’t allow myself to think that way.  Any one of us could be gone in an instant, like my friend’s loved one.  Do we stop living, stop traveling, cower in our homes against something “bad” happening?  No we don’t, we can’t.  What do we do?  We love with all our hearts, hold our loved ones close in our hearts, never hesitate to tell someone you love them and how precious they are to you.

Having survived a potentially terminal illness,  an abusive marriage and two brain surgeries and having my beloved daughters on opposite coasts, you learn to walk in faith and trust and to tuck those conversations and memories deep into your heart, to treasure them.  You don’t hang up the phone in anger and you always make a point of letting the other person know how much they mean to you, how special they are!

Because we’re afraid?  No way.  Because it’s important to speak the words.  My daughter in NYC for the next week, my older daughter in Seattle all the time, my brother and his family in the rolling hills of Kentucky, my loved ones within 40 miles, friends literally around the globe - all are special, all are precious - you’re loved and treasured and I’ll be making a point to let you know next time we talk, if I haven’t already.

Say the words and hold the memories, voices, smiles, tucked away close to your heart.  That would be the lesson to take  from my friend’s loss.  Don’t dwell; act and move forward with love and joy in your heart and spoken out of your mouth.

à bientôt …….